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(no subject)

Sep. 19th, 2011 | 08:09 am

Don't tell me what I want
Don't tell me what I need
Don't tell me how I need to feel
I feel, goddamn nothing
Dig the eyes out of my face and I can still see right
Fuckin' through you,
Fuck you and everything you are,
I'm me, we're us and that's all
Closed mind with a forum to criticize,
Keep your policy and I've got mine
Exploit me, fabricate your lies
We empower these cowards just to be left in
Silence

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Savior

Jan. 11th, 2009 | 01:47 pm

There is no reconciliation that will put me in my place
And there is no time like the present to drink these draining seconds
But seldom do these words ring true when I'm constantly failing you
Like walls that we just can't break through until we disappear

So tell me now
If this ain't love then how do we get out?
Because I don't know
That's when she said I don't hate you boy
I just want to save you while there's still something left to save

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(no subject)

Oct. 4th, 2008 | 01:07 am
mood: depresseddepressed

Highway run
Into the midnight sun
Wheels go round and round
Youre on my mind
Restless hearts
Sleep alone tonight
Sendin all my love
Along the wire

They say that the road
Aint no place to start a family
Right down the line
Its been you and me
And lovin a music man
Aint always what its supposed to be
Oh girl you stand by me
Im forever yours...faithfully

Circus life
Under the big top world
We all need the clowns
To make us smile
Through space and time
Always another show
Wondering where I am
Lost without you

And being apart aint easy
On this love affair
Two strangers learn to fall in love again
I get the joy
Of rediscovering you
Oh girl, you stand by me
Im forever yours...faithfully

Oh, oh, oh, oh
Faithfully, Im still yours
Im forever yours
Ever yours...faithfully

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When she says she loves me.....

Sep. 2nd, 2008 | 10:21 pm
mood: pensivepensive

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Well you got your reasons
And you got your lies
And you got your manipulations
They cut me down to size

Sayin you love but you dont
You give your love but you wont

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Seems the road less traveled
Shows happiness unraveled
And you got to take a little dirt
To keep what you love
Thats what you gotta do

Sayin you love but you dont
You give your love but you wont
Youre stretching out your arms to something thats just not there
Sayin you love where you stand
Give your heart when you can

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Sayin you love but you dont
You give your love but you wont
Sayin you love where you stand
Give your heart when you can

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

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I don't care.....

Jun. 13th, 2008 | 06:29 am
mood: tiredtired

Try to make it through my life, in my way, there's you
I try to make it through these lies, that's all I do

Just don't deny it
Don't try to fight this and deal with it, yeah
Just deal with it
And that's just part of it

If you were dead or still alive
I don't care, I don't care
Just go and leave this all behind
'Cause I swear, I swear
I don't care

I try to make you see my side
I always try to stay in line
But your eyes see right through
That's all they do

I'm getting buried in this place
I've got no room, you're in my face
Don't say anything, just go away

If you were dead or still alive
I don't care, I don't care
Just go and leave this all behind
'Cause I swear, I swear
I don't care

(I'm not changing everything, 'cause you won't be ther for me)
(I'm not changing everything, 'cause you won't be ther for me)

If you were dead or still alive
I don't care, I don't care
Just go and leave this all behind
'Cause I swear, I swear
I don't care

If you were dead or still alive
I don't care, I don't care
Just go and leave this all behind
'Cause I swear, I swear
I don't care at all


Hearing this song while I worked 10am-6pm reminded me of an old friend. Cause thats how I feel now after that friend stabbed me in the back.

So yea im working my ass off, right now im tired as HELL. Um, 1 week and 1 day till honey comes in !!!! But i am unsure as to what to do with her besides hang out. I know I will be working and she will be bored but alas im still very excitied that shes gonna be here. So much this week i've closed my eyes and saw us laying down and holding eachother. I cant help but think of her so much and im so glad that I have someone like her in my life. Dam back thoughts that it wont last (shock since its almost 2 years and 5 months already). <3 <3 <3

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(no subject)

Feb. 23rd, 2008 | 05:08 pm
mood: angryangry

EARSHOT LYRICS

"Wait"

Something's wrong,
Trying to conquer these fears i thought were gone.
And it's been so long, I'm dying to live in a world i dont belong

I cant wait for someone to hear me,
And wait for someone to touch me.
And wait forever to be told,
I'm forever alone.

I cant wait for someone to feel me,
And wait for someone to heal me.
And wait forever to be told,
I'm forever alone..

On my own,
I'll show myself what it means to be alone.
And the tears i cry are washed away.
All the scars are my disguise.

I cant wait for someone to hear me,
And wait for someone to touch me.
And wait forever to be told,
I'm forever alone.

I cant wait for someone to feel me,
And wait for someone to heal me.
And wait forever to be told,
Im forever alone..

I'm forever alone.
I'm forever alone.
I'm forever alone.

I, I'm not waiting here this time.

I can't wait for someone to hear me.
And wait for someone to touch me
And wait forever to be told,
I'm forever alone.

I cant wait for someone to feel me
And wait for someone to heal me
And wait forever to be told
I'm forever alone.

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My birthday gift to you....

Feb. 11th, 2008 | 10:11 pm
mood: embarrassedembarrassed

I couldn't think of anything else and I enjoy doing this.

-I squeeze my arms and night dreaming of you in them.
-I get giddy when I get to hear your voice.
-I think about everyday where we will go and what we will do in March/April.
-I find myself seeing Bioshock and thinking of you and smiling.
-I check your myspace and LJ daily in hopes something is new (I love knowing whats in the head).
-I still try and beat your guitar hero 3 scores (I can't).
-I sometimes check my phone for a random text message, even when I know nothing is there.


<3 <3 <3

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(no subject)

Feb. 8th, 2008 | 11:30 pm
mood: lonelylonely

RISE AGAINST LYRICS

"The Good Left Undone"

In fields where nothing grew but weeds,
I found a flower at my feet,
Bending there in my direction,
I wrapped a hand around its stem,
I pulled until the roots gave in,
Finding now what I’ve been missing,

But I know…
So I tell myself, I tell myself it’s wrong.
There’s a point we pass from which we can’t return.
I felt the cold rain of the coming storm.

All because of you,
I haven’t slept in so long.
When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean,
Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down,
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

Inside my hands these petals browned,
Dried up, fallen to the ground
But it was already too late now.
I pushed my fingers through the earth,
Returned this flower to the dirt,
So it can live. I walked away now.

But I know…
Not a day goes by that I don’t feel it’s burn.
There’s a point we pass from which we can’t return.
I felt the cold rain of the coming storm.

All because of you,
I haven’t slept in so long,
When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean,
Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down,
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

All because of you…
All because of you…

All because of you,
I haven’t slept in so long.
When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean,
Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down,
Inside these arms of yours.

All because of you,
I believe in angels.
Not the kind with wings,
No, not the kind with halos,
The kind that bring you home,
When home becomes a strange place.
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

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You do not know this but....

Nov. 7th, 2007 | 01:27 am

-I think of you before I sleep, EVERY night.
-I kiss the phone after I call you cause I miss kissing you.
-After work every night I wish I could come home to you.
-I think about you being here with me every day.
-At times I ponder and think "What is she doing?".
-Every day I talk to you I smile once I hear your voice and picture you.
-When laying in bed I try and remember your touch.
-When I watch TV, play a game, or just sit around I wonder what you would think if being there.
-I check my phone every chance I get, sometimes twice in a row to see if you called or text.
-When someone calls me I hope its you.
-I miss pointless drives just to get out, especially fall/spring drives to the rez.
-I change my mind every other day on what great amazing gift to get you.
-Every day I wait for Dec 28th, patiently, slowly growing insane over it.


<3 <3 <3

and there's a guy who I work with who reminds me of Abe.

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It's the return ! F3@R

Oct. 4th, 2007 | 05:08 am

If I fall along the way
Pick me up and dust me off
And if I get too tired to make it
Be my breath so I can walk

If I need some other love
Give me more than I can stand
And when my smile gets old and faded
Wait around Ill smile again

Shouldnt be so complicated
Just hold me and then
Just hold me again

Can you help me Im bent
Im so scared that Ill never
Get put back together

Youre breaking me in
And this is how we will end
With you and me bent

If I couldnt sleep could you sleep
Could you paint me better off
Could you sympathize with my needs
I know you think I need a lot

I started out clean but Im jaded
Just phoning it in
Just breaking the skin

Can you help me Im bent
Im so scared that Ill never
Get put back together

Youre breaking me in
And this is how we will end
With you and me bent

Start bending me
Its never enough
I feel all your pieces

Start bending me
Keep bending me until Im completely broken in

Shouldnt be so complicated
Just touch me and then
Just touch me again

Can you help me Im bent
Im so scared that Ill never
Get put back together

Youre breaking me in
And this is how we will end
With you and me bent

Can you help me Im bent
Im so scared that Ill never
Get put back together

Youre breaking me in
And this is how we will end
With you and me bent




Yes Virginia. Thats Bent by Matchbox 20....No there is no Santa Clause.

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